Post by scrimpy on Jun 2, 2008 12:05:34 GMT -5
R U N A W A Y
[/b][/color]This life of mine is dusted, but filled with just as much angst and drama as the rest of
the general public in my eye. Yet I can't see what others see and hold so easily. Am I out of
touch, or just born without this gift to touch another equine and feel the same comfort as
any other equine. Is it my lack of being reliable, or just the fact that I'm cruel in the most
innocent of ways. Have I just let myself slip into this coma from which I can't wake? I don't
know for all my personalities collide to tell me what to do. So I can only come to this
conclusion that I'll never know as long as I am a mortal, or until someone can show me the
way.
Walk, such a horrid pace to be confined too but I move to the beat myself. The challenge of
keeping up is not much that fancies my taste at this point, but hardly anything seems to
satisfy my hunger to push on as my dull coat of grulla portrays. Well, its just dandy in my
point of view; even better looking than a shiny coat or well groomed horse because it can
lead onto my personality or what I think to be my personality. I don't know what I'm like, or
who I am to begin with. All I know if that I am here walking at a horrid pace as I watch the
gulls fly above. Their graceful movements seem to remind me of a time when I could walk
among the clouds without the fear of falling down to the ground and landing in hell. So it
makes me wonder if I'm not an equine but a bird who has mutated into such a creature.
And I need wings to fly why? I can do it just fine in my opinion, so your opinion does not
matter. I mean look at me as I race across this revived land as the grass glazed over my hide
as I run freely. Just look at these muscles and how they move so beautifully with the grace
of an experienced equine that has not known a pampered day in her mortal life. I'd like to see
you do any better. And unlike equine, the birds do not mock me for they feel my same
longing to be up there with them. Their screeches call to me as I let my blue-ish hazel eyes
search for them as I envy them. The dull lust in my eyes lurks as I search for my way to
ascend to the heavens.
One.
Two.
Three.
With a great strides my hooves clatter against the smooth boulder surface as I hear the the
swooshing sound of water being expelled from the lichen by my own massive weight. As the
boulder increases its height I can only feel my journey beginning. With a great leap I
propelled my crossbred body into the atmosphere. Everything slows as I can hear my own
heart beats and feel in control of all my movements and mental thoughts. Slowly a smile
tugs at my lips as my eyes close to feel the air's tender grip engulf my body. Everything in
this world seems so soft now in contrast to it before. I can recall this happiness spreading to
my limbs like fire as if I am lighter than air. The strange sensation lovely, but then it ended.
Everything fell apart as my limbs touched the hellish earth and my pleasant and calm
attitude erupted into a hellish scream that sent the gulls flying far away from this place!
Sadness and wrath took hold of me as I opened my eyes to this mortal world. I could feel
every pump of my heart my body slowly seem to be decaying. The force gravity pulling my
towards the center of this hell seemed ache oh so much! Make it stop! Everything seems to
be in chains as the birds mock my confined and maladroit figure. I can't stand it anymore....
With my ears tied into my mane I went charging at the flocks with my voice screaming at
them as my aged teeth bared at them like a wolf. Hooves thrashed and pounded the ground
as everything just seemed to fall apart. I sounded like a hellish cat, but what the hell. I don't
give a d**n for they are deserving them. The few wings I managed to clip brought
satisfaction to their dishonor of mocking me. A maddening voice spoke to me from the center
of my mind that I know is not my own, but yet it is at the same time. Bucking, rearing,
shouting everything just seemed to come back to me as these painful forces inside my mind
brought unshed tears to my mind....
Halting with my head drooped down like a wilting flower I looked at horror at the two birds I
had needlessly slain. How could I have done such a thing to a creature that I knew I felt a
connection with? Their wings broken into so many pieces that even if they had survived
there was no way they could ever fly the same. Yet they were young birds as well. Disgust
and hatred for my own
'Why did I do this?' I asked myself silently with eyes closed painfully.
'Because you let your emotions override your body,' Another voice (my own) replied
inside my head.
'But I'm not a cruel person,' I answered back with mercy filled in my voice.
'But doesn't it feel good to be cruel? They deserved it for mocking you after all ' The
voice snapped back with a smooth tone as if to hypnotize you.
'Get out of head!' I screamed at the rest of them.
I gotta get out of here! Looking each and every direction I choose a path that lead into the
cracks of the boulders. I didn't once look over my shoulder for fear that the angered spirits of
the birds would come back. So I can once again as I looked up to the clear heavens. I know I
belong up there away from this place of so much misery and gloom. Only death lurks hear
and even the smell drifts in this direction. Slowing down to a walk I balanced myself as I
walked near the ledge of the boulders with my gaze up to the heavens. Stopping I asked
aloud only one question with a hope that it could be answered. "Why can't I simply touch
the sky and fly?"